----------------------------------------------------------------- THE BETTER WRITING SKILLS NEWSLETTER, November 2012 By Tim North of Scribe Consulting www.scribe.com.au ----------------------------------------------------------------- Welcome to the Better Writing Skills newsletter. IN THIS ISSUE 1. More about using a comma before "and" 2. "First, second, third" or "firstly, secondly, thirdly"? 3. "Which" or "that"? 4. Just for fun Your comments and questions are always welcome. Just send email to: info@scribe.com.au Cheers, Tim North (Perth, Western Australia) ----------------------------------------------------------------- 1. More about using a comma before "and" ----------------------------------------------------------------- My first correspondent this month, Ron, wrote in to ask how I would punctuate the following sentence: I went to the store, and, of course, spent too much money. Recall from last month's newsletter that we use a comma before the word "and" if it comes between two independent clauses. (An independent clause is simply a group of words that could stand alone as a sentence.) With that in mind, how should we punctuate Ron's sentence? Well, let's start by simplifying it: I went to the store and spent too much money. This is not two independent clauses because "spent too much money" is not a sentence. Thus, no comma is needed before "and". When we reinsert the non-essential phrase "of course" we can surround it by a pair of commas, parentheses or dashes, like so: I went to the store and, of course, spent too much money. I went to the store and (of course) spent too much money. I went to the store and -- of course -- spent too much money. All of these are quite acceptable. Ron wrote back after this exchange with a second version of his sentence. This one adds the word "I" to the second half: I went to the store, and, of course, I spent too much money. The addition of the word "I" means that this new sentence (unlike the earlier one) *is* two independent clauses: "I went to the store" and "I spent too much money". Because each of these could stand alone as a sentence, we *do* now need the comma before the joining word "and". The problem, of course, is that we now have a surplus of commas -- three of them. One solution is to replace two of them with parentheses (brackets) like so: I went to the store, and (of course) I spent too much money. Another solution is to promote the comma before the word "and" to a semicolon -- a "super comma" if you will: I went to the store; and, of course, I spent too much money. This seems rather over-punctuated for my tastes, though. It also requires the unfashionable (and soon to be extinct?) semicolon. Another approach is just to drop the word "and" altogether: I went to the store; of course, I spent too much money. I went to the store. Of course, I spent too much money. Any of the four choices presented here would be acceptable. Your choice is a matter of personal preference. Hope this helps. -- (c) 2012 Tim North: http://www.scribe.com.au ----------------------------------------------------------------- 2. "First, second, third" or "firstly, secondly, thirdly"? ----------------------------------------------------------------- My second correspondent this month, Michael, wrote in with a question about word usage: My question is, is it proper to list items for discussion as Firstly, Secondly, Thirdly or better to note them as First, Second, Third? "Wiktionary" is a collaborative project to produce a free dictionary. It's a companion project to the better-known Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. It has good commentary on this topic. It says: The usage of "firstly" is ... deprecated by some modern style guides. The Chicago Manual of Style further recommends that all such -ly forms be avoided, and that list items begin only with "first", "second", and so forth. Other authorities disagree. The American Heritage Dictionary comments: It is well established that either first or firstly can be used to begin an enumeration ... The Oxford English Dictionary notes the dispute but does not pass judgment ... "Firstly" may appear more formal than "first" and is often recommended for the formal enumeration of arguments. -- http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/firstly My reading of this and other sources is that not everyone likes "firstly, secondly, thirdly". As such, it may be better to avoid this usage. No one, though, seems to have a problem with "first, second, third". It may thus be a wiser choice. Hope this helps. -- (c) 2012 Tim North: http://www.scribe.com.au ----------------------------------------------------------------- Do you know someone who'd like this newsletter? ----------------------------------------------------------------- Do you have a friend or colleague who'd find the Better Writing Skills newsletter interesting? If so, please feel free to send a copy of this issue to them. Alternatively, please tell them they can browse back issues here: http://www.scribe.com.au/newsletter.html Thanks for helping to make this newsletter so successful! ----------------------------------------------------------------- 3. "Which" or "that"? ----------------------------------------------------------------- Consider the following sentences. Both are acceptable, but they mean quite different things. The books, which have red covers, are new. The books that have red covers are new. The first sentence implies that ALL of the books are new. The second implies that only the red books are new. In the first sentence the words "WHICH have red covers" are adding information about the books. They're telling you more about the books than you would otherwise have known. In the second sentence, the words "THAT have red covers" are restricting the sentence. They're limiting which books we're talking about. Without them, we'd be talking about all the books. With them, we're limited to talking about just the red books. This distinction leads to a simple rule of thumb for choosing between "which" and "that": Use "which" (surrounded by commas) if a group of words adds information. Use "that" if it restricts. Here are two more examples to make things clear: Classes that are held on Wednesdays are in building 206. Leap years, which have 366 days, contain an extra day in February. In the first sentence, the words "that are held on Wednesdays" are limiting the type of classes that we're talking about. (We're not talking about all the classes, only the ones held on Wednesdays.) In the second sentence, the words "which have 366 days" are adding information. We thus use "which" surrounded by commas. Is this difference worth bothering with? Let's face it, most people are unaware of the guideline set out above. Thus, we can confidently say that most people probably use "that" and "which" interchangeably. In most instances, this doesn't cause undue confusion. If you write contracts, tenders or technical specifications, though, such ambiguities could give rise to serious legal and financial problems. In such situations, it is very important to use "that" and "which" correctly. Hope this helps. -- (c) 2012 Tim North: http://www.scribe.com.au ----------------------------------------------------------------- 4. Just for fun ---------------------------------------------------------------- There's a much-copied essay on the web that starts: There is no egg in the eggplant, No ham in the hamburger And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. The Huffington Post (a news web site) ran a picture recently of a group of Syrian protesters who used this word play to eloquently express their feelings about Syrian President Bashar al-Assad: http://goo.gl/dmqBH [huffingtonpost.co.uk] Sorry for the politics. Cheers, Tim. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Would you like more help with your writing? ----------------------------------------------------------------- On my web site, you'll find my range of jargon-free, downloadable e-books that will help you to become a better writer. These e-books will help you with business proposals, report writing, term papers, technical writing, grant writing, creative writing and more. 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